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August 24, 2011
Dear Lady in the minivan at the recycling center,
I appreciate your attempt to reduce your waste by recycling some of your household trash. However, it COMPLETELY defeats the whole point when you open your hatchback and allow half a dozen mostly deflated balloons and their plastic strings to float lazily out of your car into the wind. I saw you watch them roll along the pavement without care. The fact that I had to go chasing after them as the wind picked up made me rather aggrivated. I realize it's not your fault that I decided to go to the recycling center still wearing my skirt from work so that my actions in picking up your mess may have caused me to flash a few people my underclothes.
This situation is not what caused me to swear at you, and even though it was not my most glorious momment I can't really say that I feel remorse for doing so. I didn't even swear at you for bringing all of your recyclables in plastic grocery bags. At least you gave them a little re-use before getting rid of them and I appreciate your attempt at following at least 2 of the famous Rs. No, lady in the minivan at the recycling center, what caused me to swear at you wasn't any of these things. It was when you half hazardly attempted to throw your plastic bags away into the trash bin near the recycling bins, failed, and then watched your plastic bags get scattered by the wind. That was when I asked you if you were f***ing kidding me. Because seriously, are you F-ing kidding me?! I was in a skirt and not looking to get exercise at that particular moment. I apologize if my initial round of running around after your trash confused you into thinking I was looking for some kind of mad dash running routine in a skirt at the recycling center. The fact that you then gave me a dirty look and never once apologized for littering at the recycling center or thanked me for picking up your mess twice indicates to me that you are not a very nice person. I would also like to inquire as to your motives for recycling in the first place. It is clear that it is not your care for the planet as you seem to have none.
The girl in the skirt running around after your trash at the recycling center
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